life is a game

She said she’s afraid
of things that never happened yet
It’s hard to live
When her mind is always holding back
She has her doubts
She’s afraid to fall down
But she can’t move on like this so she needs to get up from this

So I tell her that
You’ll be okay
You’ll be okay
Despite what the others say
Don’t be afraid
Don’t be afraid
This life is a game, learn how to play

When she fails
She can’t look at herself
She walks around
With her hair in her face and her head down
She has her doubts
She’s afraid to fall down
But she can’t move in like this
She boutta go face to face with it


distractions (standing in the rain)

stood outside in the rain
let it drown my skin
the cold wakes me up
i feel human again

i look down at my feet
realize where i am where’s I’m standing
i’ve been in a daze
i’ve been so disconnected

distractions, too many distractions
i want to feel again
distractions, too many distractions
i want to feel again

keeping me away
i want to feel again
standing in the rain
i can feel again

something bout the clouds
comforts me that i feel the same way
sometimes it reflects who i can be
dark, and gray

i look down at my hands
realize this is who i am
i’ve been out out of my head
i didn’t think i could feel so disconnected

stop everything
feel again
stop everything
feel the wind
stop everything
let the clouds sink in
let the rain touch your skin
stop everything

distractions, too many distractions
i can feel again
letting go of all these distractions
i can feel again


can’t sleep, can’t dream
can’t keep the sheets on my bed neat
im tired, not sleepy, how can I fall asleep
all night I toss and turn and my mind has no rest
I’m half awkake the whole night, I can barely survive the next day
my head hurts, i have no break
between now and the morning
I need help, maybe another weekend
to tire myself out through the booze and get some sleep again
I miss it, just dozing off
deep sleeps and cleansed mindset
I doubt anyone knows
we’re all worn out from something
all have a different story
different excuses for being exhausted
some have it worse
but lacking sleep is one of the worst
it’s not my bed
it’s not my sheets
it’s not the lights fading above me
it’s probably my late night thoughts that attack me
without rest my body shakes
my mind races, my body gets hot
but the air is too cold
I can never be comfortable
I have to settle for something
I just need sleep
let me fall
give me a break
I need to dream and wake up clean of yesterday’s negativity

may 28th 12:05 am


the sun is out
it is strong
now my body is hot

i feel cool
like the breeze
and the dewy grass beneath me

i feel fresh
like the flowers
that i lay in, they’re so small

i find shade
cools me off
watch the others run around

what the fuck is this

may 18, 2015 8:35 PM

new sun

it’s been months
finally the sun has come out
was I in a dark dream
have i just woken up
this sunlight, so foreign
like the first time i’m feeling it
it’s almost nostalgic
triggers mood so pensive
open up the shades
let the real light in

high school heart

she would cry every night trying to get him to love her again
her eyes were dark and full of sadness, a feeling she never planned

she went months without him, she started going mad
just one more touch was all she would ask

losing him, dreaming of him, she missed all the times
they used to be inseparable, in his hands, her heart still lies
time went by until she realized what had been missing
the hurt in her heart was his fault from the beginning

once again she found herself late at night
wondering why he had been gone this whole time

she knew the truth and it hurt to hear it from him
but the truth is better than not knowing a thing

if he loved her why would he leave her
hurting, breaking, alone
maybe because she didn’t know the love she had for him
until he was long gone

December 30 2:02 AM


time in slow motion
wonder who you’re lovin
now things are different
I’m on this side holdin onto nothin

walk away, walk away from me
away from this place, i’ll let you be
my heart beats too fast, I can’t sleep
no more of this, you did this to me

time goes too fast,i can’t see
when I look back
everything is so blurry

our perception of time was different
connection we had was lost, so distant
was it good, was it bad, who cares/doesn’t matter, you already left
all I have left are all those songs you wrote
did you mean them, or was our time here just a joke

october 22, 2015 1:37 PM on train to London