I try to keep myself busy
so I won’t overthink
but once I lay down at midnight to sleep
the thoughts suffocate my mind
I am always tired
I wish there was a way to keep my thoughts calm
I push through the sleepy feeling
and force my body to work
but once again
when I lay down the next night
my mind is the one that works
It’s so easy to not feel anything,
the more pain I should feel, the more I hold back.
Then there are those days when I break down.
It all builds up, then that’s when it’s painful
I wish I could be normal and let it out on time
but I’m different, and so is my mind.
I feel numb most of my days
until something hits me and breaks through the numbed space